WHY is this happening?

I have spent the last few days since the election trying to figure out what the hell is going on and more importantly, WHY it’s happening.

It would seem impossible that so many more people who have a gullible sensibility and are easily susceptible to marketing ploys and hate mongering and wallowing in resentment and anger would OUT VOTE the intelligent, passionate, caring, inclusive, accepting, unity voters. Yet, here we are.

There is little solace in the fact that only 47% of eligible voters did their duty, but of the more than half who did, we had our votes diverted due to the rules of the antiquated Electoral College which elected TRUMP. Berating him is pointless and it’s clear that pointing out WHO this guy is and what he stands for does nothing to his supporters who blindly give him a pass for any and all indiscretions, insults, lies and unlawful activity.


So now what?

I honestly believe that the only thing that this horrendous event will do that is worth anything, is to UNIFY the rest of us. And who are WE? We are minorities and whites, women men and children, we come from varied and wonderful backgrounds and cultures and religions. We allow everyone to love who the love, we believe in science because, well, it’s SCIENCE, we are thoughtful of others without exception to their race or religious beliefs, we are a family, we are a community.

When we look at the majority of his supporters, they are devoid of many of these qualities and the ALT-RIGHT has done their job well. They have been spinning their anger and resentment for decades and the suppressed are desperate enough to believe anything if it FEELS relatable. I don’t hear of these folks doing much to build UP, we hear only of divide and division, of complaints and not pragmatic long-term ends to poverty, hunger, or working towards increasing education for better opportunities.

So they live in their bubble and we live in our, only theirs GREW while we were busy focused on education, equality, justice, science and protecting the Earth and it’s inhabitants… They had the opportunity to join us, but chose not to. And now, as they try to rip apart our country with continued hateful speech and separatism, we see peaceful marches with seas of peoples who look like… AMERICA. All shades, shapes, religions, sexualities, education and economic levels. And that’s important. When we bond, then the issues between various ethnicities diminish, when a group of people surround a young Muslim who is praying, that IS America. When a Mexican American and Black American link arms and march together, that IS America. When transgender rights protected, that IS America. When our land is protected, that IS America. When women’s rights are protected, that IS America.

So for the moment, I will be grateful that we are uniting. It’s sad that we have to come together because of fear from the Alt-Right and the Trump believers who want for themselves and their own – but that is where we are, so now we must reintroduce ourselves to the world and SHOW them who America really IS.

Time to get to work.



We have a new choice to make… we can wallow in fear that this country is going to turn back the clock and take the rights of women and minorities and immigrants away, or stand up and reclaim our voices and move the nation forward, yet again.

To my children, I apologize. I am sorry that all the change your grandparents and great grandparents fought so hard for may be slipping away, but now is the time for you to join us in ending the mindset of “mine not yours” of “me” over “we.” So we have work to do and we need you to help us clean up, as we have so often done in the past.

So join us children, we have a world to impress with our compassion, intellect, strength, love, understanding, power and grace. We have people and a planet to protect and we have a legacy to protect as well.

Here we go!

No, I WON’T just write what I know…

If you are a writer, you know the old adage, “Write what you know.” But frankly I can’t disagree more…

I am a storyteller. I create worlds where my characters and scenarios entertain and sometimes inform a reader. When a chef wants to come up with a new dish, they pull from all their sources and then take some chances. Writers are the same in that we are trying to create something unique and different but still something someone would want to consume. But how can that happen if we limit ourselves to what we know without the commitment to go out and learn more, experience more, hear, see and taste more?

As a writer, my job is to expand far beyond what I know and dive deep into worlds that I don’t know, places that I am not familiar with and stretch my knowledge – sometimes past my comfort zone. If I only wrote what I now know, my writing would be static and uninspired after only a few projects, and it would only speak on a limited number of topics. I look at writers who are kind enough to incorporate their incredible life’s journeys in their writing and I say, yes! That’s what we need more of!

There is no way that writers of brilliant books and films about outer space, pirates, Pharaohs and Kings courts ever experienced them first had. They researched, traveled, imagined and then put pen to paper… they stepped out of what they knew and explored to get filled with a bit of magic – that’s what we are supposed to do. Fill ourselves with magic and then dispense it throughout the worlds that we create.


So for me,  just writing what I know is not enough. I will continue to study, travel, learn and grow because it’s the journey that makes life interesting, not solely the destination.


Give Me Some Brain Time!

I was talking to my best friend and we got on the topic of down time really being Brain Time, time for our brains to process things. Being that she’s a veterinarian neurosurgeon, she would know.  We got on the topic after a shared need to on occasion need quiet time just to think. Granted, I don’t really require as much time as she does when she’s, say, prepping for a surgery, but it all falls into the same human need to allow our brains to just wonder which, in turn, allowing us to more easily create, process and recall. I was blown away when she told me that 20% of our body’s energy is used on brain power! No wonder we’re so tired some times!

She reminded me of  how our elementary school used to force us little kids to just chill, to take a walk, to pick flowers at the park or at our school’s farm, to think of a poem or sing a song, to do “nothing” which is really a lot of something awesome. But this Brain Timeisn’t kids stuff, this is human stuff, this is what we all need to do all the time to give our minds and therefore bodies, a rest.

Notice how when you relax you recall more? Yeah, that’s by design, you’ve given your brain a moment to rest to function a little better. We’re always in such a rush, going here, doing that, wanting, moving almost in a blind fury, but where the hell are we going? And do we really want to be there once we arrive? Sometimes what we need is down time, to just shut things off for a moment and clear our heads. And so many wonderful things can come from that seemingly small action. I seem to come up with brilliant ideas when I’m washing my hair! Lol. I think it’s due to having nothing to focus on other than a task that takes no focus, therefore giving me unplanned Brain Time.


The word Meditation triggers calm in some while causing anxiety in others. Those who resist it usually say it’s too hard, hell yeah it’s hard, anything worth learning can be, but that’s also why it’s so great. Mediation kinda forces you to quiet all the voices in your head and pause your physical movements to just rest your mind granting your brain a little well-earned vacay.

Fighting our body’s need for Brain Time is pointless when we’ve EARNED IT! We work hard and we should never feel guilty for taking a 2o minute break to just close our eyes and letthoughts wonder around without obligation or direction.


When was the last time you gifted yourself with Brain Time? What did you feel or what did you discover? And if can’t remember the last time you did, try it now and tell me what you got from it.


I don’t know wtf to do about the murder of black people in America

Well said my friend.

Surviving Limbo

I’m white so I generally take a very respectful, reserved approach when speaking of my own pain and grief in watching black men and women needlessly perish at the hands of cops. Murder is what it’s called. Government sanctioned murder. But the truth is, I cry every time. I’m haunted every time. I think of Sandra Bland every single day.

I’m a pacifist, averse to images of violence. I watched the video of Alton Sterling’s murder, not because I’m sadistic, but because we deserve to suffer through watching the horrific truth of what’s being perpetrated on black people. You don’t get to look away. We don’t get to look away.

I saw a man murdered. I immediately recalled the words of Jesse Williams “… we know that police somehow manage to de-escalate, disarm and not kill white people every day.” It’s undeniable.

I cried this morning. I tweeted my outrage (as if that does…

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So Fucking Grateful!

Life can be a real pill sometimes.
We get hit from all sides and dragged down so often that it’s hard to want to get up again, but we survive each day and must be grateful that we are here to kick and scream our way back in.
I believe we are put in situations and amongst certain people for a reason… maybe to enlighten us, teach us, comfort or inspire us. Maybe they are just a reminder that some people suck and aren’t worth the air they breathe, but that only helps us appreciate the people who uplift us all the more.
It’s easy to be alone. And over time, it’s comforting to remain wrapped in a cocoon, but then what? Who’s there to challenge us, love us, make us see what isn’t in front of us, make us feel the sunlight on our face, admire a full moon or a simple walk on the sand?

We’re here living our lives and that’s not a small thing. We can all wish for more, but looking at what we already have, setting goals for what we want to achieve next and helping others along the way can be a serious high.  Go have an awesome day!


We simply cannot know what is in store for us. The bad can be so painful and the good, sometimes is far and in between. Death, fear, anger, resentment turn to poison and it settles inside of us seeping into the crevices of our souls. The weight of it, the pain, the numbness and then the way that we can get used to it and almost long for it, is a frightful reality for many.

The work that it takes to pull out of the murkiness that seems to want to drown us is even more painful, because it involves needing some hope. Hope and optimism that things can and will get better. Because the reality is that it will not get better without us wanting it to. It will not get better if we do not work towards looking at the opposing side of the sadness.

– We lose a loved one and the pain is overwhelming, but then there is the side that makes us grateful for having had that person in our lives to begin with.

– We lose a job or part or opportunity that we had set our hopes on, but then we must be grateful that we will have opportunities.

– We lose a great friend or a great love, but now we know what love and true friendship felt like and we know ourselves more now and can grow and seek it again.

We have the choice to be miserable and we have the choice to do something about our misery. We have a choice to make our lives meaningful by helping others and focusing on the good because we can always find something to complain about, that’s easy. Growing from each experience, especially the ones that feel like they are crushing our souls, that right there, that is making the best of the lives we have and living to our full potential.

It’s not about our dress size, the type of car we drive,  the amount we have in the bank or number of followers we have… it’s about being content when we look in the mirror and learning to be proud of who we are and what we are doing while we’re here.

~ Grateful.

2016 and beyond

Who are we?

There is a perception of each person we encounter, including ourselves…

We have an idea, a picture of who everyone is. We look at them and judge, and though it may be subtle, it may be a fleeting moment, a quick flash, we still do it…

What matters, though, is not what the momentary glimpse of judgement may say about us, it is, instead, about who we believe ourselves to truly be.

I look back and recall who I used to be and now look forward at who I have become and in that, I don’t regret anything, for it is all those experiences that have brought me to this place where I am grateful to be. Not just because it’s better, but because it is real.

We have to reflect not just on others, but upon ourselves as well. Perhaps for a few minutes before this year ends, we will look back with gratitude for all that has occurred and pull from it all the good and feel grateful, and look at all the bad, learn our lessons from it and then and allow it to remain in the past.